Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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