Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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