So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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