Texts From Last Night

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  (845): View more from New York

  8:17pm: So, How was fun day?

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success

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  (845) 8:17pm: So, How was fun day? (201) 1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success http://tfl.nu/xkzo
  Replies (11) Good night (1503) Bad night (381)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.

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  (434): I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents. http://tfl.nu/eibu
  Replies (18) Good night (646) Bad night (5784) Order T-Shirt
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  (416): View more from Ontario

  Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.

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  (416): Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her. http://tfl.nu/nm33
  Replies (10) Good night (896) Bad night (2955) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.

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  (443): Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one. http://tfl.nu/dq1o
  Replies (131) Good night (7760) Bad night (2008) Order T-Shirt
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  (408): View more from California

  My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?

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  (408): My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know? http://tfl.nu/68pr
  Replies (8) Good night (2401) Bad night (1075) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.

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  (313): I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents. http://tfl.nu/eaix
  Replies (6) Good night (2952) Bad night (766)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  "If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse

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  (301): "If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse http://tfl.nu/r0b8
  Replies (9) Good night (639) Bad night (582) Order T-Shirt
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself

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  (708): We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself http://tfl.nu/lyck
  Replies (2) Good night (753) Bad night (482) Order T-Shirt
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night

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  (601): I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night http://tfl.nu/iazm
  Replies (3) Good night (754) Bad night (276) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.

  (1-215): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's not even 9:30 yet..

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  (215): Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk. (1-215): It's not even 9:30 yet.. http://tfl.nu/cpxo
  Replies (6) Good night (715) Bad night (265) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry

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  (610): Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry http://tfl.nu/g7mi
  Replies (3) Good night (583) Bad night (219) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.

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  (703): Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life. http://tfl.nu/38t1
  Replies (4) Good night (684) Bad night (248) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.

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  (+44): Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off. http://tfl.nu/1dmr
  Replies (1) Good night (483) Bad night (129) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.

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  (717): Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward. http://tfl.nu/kv4q
  Replies (3) Good night (380) Bad night (133) Order T-Shirt
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  (210): View more from Texas

  My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.

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  (210): My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels. http://tfl.nu/r3d1
  Replies (1) Good night (331) Bad night (139) Order T-Shirt

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