Where did you get a picture of my penis
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize