So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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