Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
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WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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