Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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