you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize