I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize