They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
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