Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
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I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
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conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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