You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize