I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize