I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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