We just shotgunned beers for America
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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