ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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