remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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