I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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