I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize