I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize