is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
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I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
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THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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