I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize