my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize