Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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