At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
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He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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