how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
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