babies were throwing up all over the place
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize