We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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