I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize