You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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