If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
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Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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