Heybabeimwearingurpanties
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too much gin, very little bucket
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize