i think my tv is drunk
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
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