5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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