I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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