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I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
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