I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize