So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
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i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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