Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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