I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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