I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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