I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
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I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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