let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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