I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
We are two peas in an std pod
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
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