oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
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