I like to think it a success when the cops are called
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize