I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
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