Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize