Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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